Linda Clevenger

When Life Isn’t Fair

by | Dec 13, 2014 | Around Town, Business

A weekly column on Fredericksburg.Today by Linda Clevenger, Organization Direct.

Have you heard your child tell you it isn’t fair?  A normal parental response is probably — life isn’t fair.

The interesting thing is that this conversation isn’t just limited to parents and their children who are under the age of 18. I just spent a weekend with family and I actually heard my parents saying it to one of my adult sisters.

Well, I am a believer that we may not always be able to control what happens in our lives. However, we can control our action and reaction to what happens.

A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog called “Weather or Not.” The winter season of 2013/2014 was an eye-opener for many. I have lived here for 22 years and it was definitely the coldest winter that I remember.  I definitely don’t remember schools being closed for so many days. As days went on, I can imagine that people were saying, “it isn’t fair.”  I think it was especially difficult for the day care providers who had even more responsibility to care for our children because schools were closed. I know that our school only closed a few days and that was when the snow was really bad. They didn’t get a break.

This will be the first of a blog series based on the topic of “It isn’t Fair” and how, I believe, you can change and rearrange your life to view every life experience as an opportunity.

Some of the times that I thought ‘it isn’t fair’ include:

My husband is deployed over the holidays
That I have no time for myself
I feel overwhelmed trying to do it all myself
I work harder than anyone else at the office
It took me eight hours to get home from work while everyone else at the office was sitting at home with their families
Our air conditioner went out just when the weather hit 100 degrees
Our washing machine quit working just one week before our planned Disney vacation
My husband fell off of the roof and seriously injured himself
I have to get up in the middle of the night to soothe a crying grandchild
Someone thinks it is okay to try to sabotage everything that you have worked so hard to accomplish.

You can take the words “It isn’t fair that…” and add them to each comment above.

Over the last five years, I have learned to remove the words “it isn’t fair” from my thinking. I can tell you that these systems that I use (on a daily basis) have changed my life, my family dynamics, as well as our family relationships.

Adjusting how you view a situation, even though it may seem traumatic, will allow you to concentrate on your actions and reactions and also provide you with the words that you can use to turn feeling overwhelmed into actionable thoughts that will produce positive results.

When you think that life isn’t fair, know that everything happens for a reason -– even if you don’t agree with it and especially when you don’t plan it. I think that a life that is predictable would be so boring! So stay tuned. Next week I’ll begin sharing “how” to stop saying the words “it isn’t fair.”

Linda’s previous columns:

Is Your ‘Things to Do’ List Going Nowhere?
Your Attitude Affects Your End Result
What is Your Messy Room Nightmare?
Weather or Not – It Happens!

Thank you for reading.  Follow Fredericksburg.Today on Facebook and Twitter, too.

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